We've all been there. Someone has said something without really thinking about what they said. The words used could have been hurtful, embarrassing, careless, lies, impulsive, or revealing. We likely have experience being the speaker as well as the receiver. We likely have witnessed an emotion such as anger or anxiety speaking through a person rather than the rational mind. We wish we could take back what we said. We wish we could have not heard what was shared. Yes, we have all been there.
How many times have we heard or told people to think before we/they speak? Probably many. This is easier said than done. While expanding on my learning recently, I came across a very helpful acronym that breaks down exactly what we can do to think before we speak. As soon as I learned of it, I immediately knew this was to be the topic this month. It is so important for us to know. I do not know of the original source, but whoever it is- thank you!
Here is how we can T.H.I.N.K. before we speak:
T - is it True?
H - is it Helpful?
I - is it Inspiring?
N - is it Necessary?
K - is it Kind?
Before we use our words, we can ask ourselves these 5 questions. My hope is for you to be an effective communicator, maintain and repair relationships, and use your words to build others up rather than tear them down. Try it and see how you feel.
THINK is so useful! I will share it with my adult ADHD clients, too. Not only for how it affects their interpersonal relationships, but also for how it affects their professional communication.
ReplyDeleteThe THINK set appears to come from many earlier sources. Some parts of it are mentioned in Buddhist sutras (but other parts are incorrectly attributed to the Buddha). Another version includes "Does it improve upon the silence?"
I have more comments I'd like to add, but they won't improve on the silence, so I'll stop now :-)